Sorry...

Sorry about no encouragement for the last two days. Our watergirl list keeps getting bigger and I encountered a problem where it wouldn't let me send my notes because our list had gotten too big. So now, we have two lists and we will see how that works.

Some day, I am going to have a "word wall". On that wall, I am going to have all kinds of "God Words". One of the words that will be on the wall will be, "REPENT". Perhaps when you hear that word you hear this crazy, southern, preacher voice yelled in a passionate, angry tone leaving a sour taste in your mouth. Last night, I encountered the word, "repent" in an incredibly beautiful experience.

REPENT- To feel remorse or self-reproach for what one has done or failed to do;Be contrite;to feel such remorse or regret for past conduct as to change one's mind regarding it; to be sorry

Last night, as my youngest son, Zeke, and I were interacting at bedtime (ahhhhhh...that time of night for me that seems to be one of my weakest) we were encountering one of those "wonderful" attitude issues. My children KNOW the command of God for children to obey and honor and respect their parents. Yet, we ALL know that battle of knowing what is right and DOING what is right. As I was prodding him along in his bedtime routine I was getting this lip-smacking, saliva-filled sound coming from his mouth. It was one of those mannerisms that you know he has heard somewhere else from someone else. I had never heard this sound come from Zeke's mouth before(although there have been many other sounds I've heard) and I DID NOT LIKE IT! It sounded VERY disrespectful (the sound came when I would tell him something and he didn't like it) So- I told him how that felt in my heart and if I heard it again there would be a consequence. Well- guess what...surprise, surprise....unlike the rest of us, he pushed the limit and made that wonderful sound AGAIN. So I squeezed his little lips together firmly in a nice puckering shape. Hoping that would be the end of it, I went on to tuck another little Link in bed. Unfortunately, we encountered this sound "one more time." This time, tired from my day, anxious to spend alone time with my husband, and very frustrated with his disrespectful attitude, I responded to his noise in anger and made that same lip puckering squeeze but this time, it was very harsh,very long, and with some angry words from his mom. I'm telling you, bedtime is my weakest time. As I approached him to make this right, his response to me was, "get away from me!" Afraid of doing or saying something foolish in the heat of the moment, I decided I would do just what he requested which was probably what was best for both of us at that time. I chose to blow off my steam and process what had just happened by finishing up that never-ending laundry of ours. Probably 10 minutes after that sour encounter I heard Zeke coming downstairs crying, asking Rob "where's mom?" Rob, thinking Zeke was avoiding staying in his bed said, "Zeke- get back in your bed." "Dad, I've got to talk to mom, where is she?" Zeke said. At this point, as Zeke began sobbing, Rob realized something else was going on and directed him to the laundry room. He came into that laundry room and hugged me sooooo tightly not letting go for at least 3 minutes. I caressed his precious head telling him I forgive him and telling him I was sorry for my own anger and harshness. He went back up to bed. As I went up to simply make sure he was okay, he ran to me again hugging me like it was the last hug we would ever have. Then, with a very emphatic tone he asked for some paper. What I received last night, from my very, VERY, repentant son will go in his "box" and will hold a special place in my heart forever. I received a picture of him and I together with the words, "I love you so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so (8 "sos") much mom."

May I encourage you to first of all, make your relationship with people soooooo rich, so full of love that any rift in that is hard on the soul- leading to repentance.

May I encourage you to deepen your walk with God and your love of God so that you will be sorry and remorseful for anything that breaks his heart and disrupts your fellowship with him. He loves you so much. Nothing is sweeter than "walking in the light and having fellowship with him and one another." (1 John 1:6 & 7)

May I encourage you to "repent" like Zeke, being truly, truly broken for the way we hurt each other and turn in the direction of love. We are on this earth for such a short time to learn to love. May we do it well! Blessings from Bombadil. May your soul be watered.

"Repent, for the kingdom of heaven is near." Matthew 4:17

p.s.- Now Zeke and I can go to our mother/son dance next Friday with everything well between us.....ahhhhhh....repentance......ahhhhhhhh.....fellowship.